Stiffy Makane: Apocolocyntosis — 31 of 235

One of the Bruces and Drunken Bastard

Release 1

Part Seventeen - "Ground Rules"

Table of Dedicants

"Graham Nelson""il miglior fabbro"
"Emily Short""la migliore fabbra"
"Ezra Pound""il miglior fabbro"
"T.S. Eliot""il miglior fabbro"
"Jacek Pudlo""il miglior fabbro"
"Steve Breslin""il peggior fabbro"
"Robb Sherwin""il miglior fabbro"
"Andrew Plotkin""il miglior fabbro"
"Mark Ryan""il miglior uomo"

Rule for printing the banner text during Medias Res: do nothing.

This is the major-scene-change rule:

if testing is not in progress, pause the game;

now the last_wanking_turn is 0;

now the last_pissing_turn is 0;

now the last_shitting_turn is 0.

Every turn:

follow the adjust light rule;

if in darkness


increase the global_darkness_counter by 1;

let N be the global_darkness_counter;

if N > 1


let M be the global_darkness_counter - 1;

if a random chance of M in N succeeds


say "Very close behind you, you hear a small, nasty chuckle, just before the blinding pain begins.";

end the story saying "You have been eaten by a grue";

end if;


say "You are likely to be eaten by a grue[14 as a reference].";

end if;


now the global_darkness_counter is 0;

end if.

When play begins:

move Stiffy Makane to the battlement;

now the player is Stiffy Makane;

move yourself to Limbo;

check Unicode compliance;

now the right hand status line is "Score: [score]";

move first_footnote to Limbo;

move first_reference to Limbo;

move greenish pus to Limbo;

now the stiffycock is lit;

now the stiffycolor of the stiffycock is blue;

say "[paragraph break][paragraph break]";

choose a random row in the Table of Dedicants;

[ say "[first custom style]FOR [Dedicant entry in caps][roman type]";]

say "[first custom style]FOR [Dedicant entry in upper case][roman type]";

say "[paragraph break]";

say "[second custom style][epigram entry][roman type]. [1 as a reference]";

say "[paragraph break][paragraph break]";

move the Golden Banana to Stiffy Makane;

now the golden banana is handled;

now the golden banana is warned_about.

[ Every turn:

If a garment is worn and the player is Stiffy Makane, move the stiffycock to Limbo;

otherwise move the stiffycock to Stiffy Makane. ]